u are driving me crazy

it's been so long and i still can't get you outta my head
and just when i didn't want to tink of anithin' animore..
u will juz suddenly pop out another stunt
wad the hell is wrong wif u!

if u wanted to delete...
u wld have deleted the stuffz on ur facebk..instead of mine...
if u wanted to delete...
u wld have deleted the photos...every single trace...
y u come and harass my facebk...
though it's ur post..but it's my wall!!!!!!

been goin' out these few days...
which is good...haha..kill boredom
wed went jp wif jason
yest went causeway wif CBC ppl
later goin shaw den royal scotts wif jcrc ppl

slpt during presentation 2dae..
SHUANG! =)
hahaha..but slp until my hand pain..c0s' my arms were folded...
nt bad leh..can slp..hahaha...
and n0w...as usual..slAckin' again..
we're being released earlier this time round..
5pm can zhao le..=P

ok..i found one friend who got into uni..
but nt NTU..=(
haha...but at least get into uni la...
but is nt poly de...
mayb they put the A lvl ppl with higher piority...

ok..my no. 10. summarised frm si yun..haha..c0s' oso jason thinks so to0...=P

10. he gt no guts

when i least wanted 2 c u..
u appear...
daMn...
GO AWAY!!!!!

i found no. 9: u always tell LIES

10 things i hate abt you

1. you are stingy
2. cheapskate
3. likes to bully girls
4. slps at holy hours
5. watch to0 much porn
6. like to say the F word
7. BALD
8. moody swings

damMit...i dun even have 10 things i hate abt him...
WA LAU....=X

haha..this was wad jason ask me 2 do...
think of reasons y he's nt gd for me..haha...
and i cannot find 10...
nvm..it's a gd start..hahhaha..

i tink i'm goin the grad in the normal 4 yrs..
but end up taking more than 144 AUs...
=Xx...
want 2 take so so mani things...
gt concentrations n minor in biz..
dotz...as if studyin' is tt fun...=Xx

to whoeva is readin'...do ignore this post..it's sepcially for me 2 bitch onli..=P

daRn...i ren v.long le..i still wan 2 bitch bout that bastard n my ex...
they're fuckin' none of my business la..but i juz hate it when they bitch...
esp when i kn0w their bitchin' is daMn wth de...
they bitch as if they're the most perfect person in the entire universe and the whole world loves them so daMn much...PUKES..
tt guy onli kn0ws how ta bitch la...
everyday bitch abt anione under the sun...
his temperment is worse than mine..
BASTARD..
and i dunn0e why the fuckin' hell my ex is still daMn gd friends wif him...
maybe my ex's juz to0 stupid...
tt's y i left him...
oh man..and he can still tag my ex blog..bitchin' bout dunn0e wad rubbish...
OMG....he shld juz con't bitchin' bout the whole world until the whole world will hate him...
wad a fucker...

i wan go changi airport T3..anione wana go???

2dae gt successful nice reactions..=))

but i still can't stop tinkin' bout him...
SIANZ...
shifted him here there frm grp 2 grp...but dosen't seem to work ar...

and i want 2 cut off all connections..but
haha... i tink i cann't live ALONE..for long..
mayb one or 2 days is ok..
but the thought of cutting off all connections (i.e. is other friends)
for the nxt 2 mths..
2MTHS mind u...
i'll juz bang my head against the wall and when my ro0mie comes back..
she'll juz collect the wadeva that's left over la...
HAI...so u c n0w...
this is so tortorous...

haha..lyk wad jason says..
i seriously need 2 find new friends..
but that will take lyk...another 2 mths..so for n0w...
it'll juz b...REN! =X

funnie conversation wif me n jason last nite..
ME: i can't smell..so when my mentor ask me 2 smell..i get damn scared...
*in da middle gt some other..i can't smell this..can't smell that...
JASON: so now u onli gt 4 senses la...
ME: *think for a while...den said...no..i still gt 5...c0s' i gt 6th sense...
=P

aniwaes...feel lyk goin' out..
i wan go expo..haha..aft wad liqi tell me...
lyk gt a lot of things dere...
and i still wana go escape...
free frm 26th june to 2nd jul..
c0s' mentor on holiday...
so we oso on holiday..
haha..=))

juz finished separating 2 isomers...
stupid isomer..y muz stick 2gether make my product UNPURE...
hhahaha...and back frm running NMR...
waitin' for time 2 pass...
den i'll go wash stuffz...
SIAN...
i broke my TLC plate 2dae...
WHEN I HAVEN'T SEEN the product yet..
urGH!=X
lucky is minor thing onli...

plspls pray hard that i don't break anithin' k!!!!!
and no more losing of my products...

you were the first person to ask me to wear contacts...
now that i have contacts...
i wanted u to be the first person to know...
but i don't think that will ever happen...

yuppz..i gt my contacts le..
haha...and there goes another $80++ frm my card...
c0s' i had 2 pay the remaining of my deposit myself...
heng didn't realli have to try THAT long to wear it..haha..
took less than an hr...haha..
nxt time if want 2 wear muz wake up early juz to put it into my eyes..hahah...

watchin' vineyard man now...korean drama..
nt bad la..

yest watched this korean movie...
innocent steps..
recommended for ppl who like dancing...
quite nice sh0w...=)

don't 'dis-own' meeeeeee....

finished my presentation...
half cui..haha...
was daMn nervous...den i paused awhile for one word..haha..
heng prof loh nt ard...den can juz briefly say say...
c0s' no one will even listen de la...
so IT'S OK! =)

aniwae...2dae was slack day again..
did NO lab at all..haha..
the whole morning is touchin up on my slides...
den afternoon presentation....
den early release...=))

my friend didn't manage 2 b offered NTU n SMU...
sians...poly competition so damn SHIONG...
dragon babies fate..=Xx
ok..n0w 2 of my best friends didn't get uni...
daRn...
i tot the other one will b offered a plc leh...her results lyk supposed 2 b nt bad de...

so means..nxt time...
no job for us lia0...
even hall allocation up by two points...
wa sian...

to0 many things le...
i'm all prepared 2 give up runnin jcrc nxt yr...
haha..aft privatising my blog...feel so safe 2 juz write bout all these..

wad the hell is wrong wif me today la...
i totally screwed up my lab..urGH!
i wasn't even tinkin' bout anithin' in da first plc...
.......
i forget to close the separating funnel thing...
so end up..my product flowed out and juz lyk tt..GONE...
daRn...
and summore...NO MORE STARTING MATERIAL..
i tink mayb need 2 make the starting material again...
sian...i felt damn bad la...
juz lyk tt one whole day g0ne 2 waste..=Xxx

but aniwae..
2dae during lab...c0s' since no more expt...equals nothin' 2 do le..
i ended up watchin' national treasure...
daMn nice leh...
c until engrossed.haha...my partner tell me..she wanted 2 ask me sumtink..den i nvr rply..haha..
and i wanted 2 eat chicken cutlet juz n0w..
ended up ordering chicken chop...
WA LAU...
i dunn0e wad the hell i wrong wif me...
i totally screwed up my whole day la...

my blog is PRIVATISED...
i juz decided...those ppl shldn't know to0 much...
i can't believe kenneth actually gt my blog link...
but well..i don't care..juz privatise l0r...
aft yest..i tot they a bit the weird weird...so i decided to privatise it...

yest went 2 eat wif kenneth raymond n woods...
yes and i owe kenneth money...
some idiot thing...
and kenneth yest added a lot of wasabi into my sushi!!!!
arGH!!! daMn!!!!
i shan't say anithin'....
nt goin 2 say anithing bad..though i badly want to..haha..

aniwae...yest i actually won 2 times in bridge...
haha...lyk finally i can win kenneth k...idiot!

i'm slackin' again as u can c...
haha...so hapPie..liqi workin' at SPMS building!
same plc as me!! haha...=))
h0pefully if i sian can go find him ka jia0..

I AM GOING TO DIE NOW....
and when i wake up...
i'll FORGET EVERYTHING every every single daMned thing..
bout YOU YOU YOU and YOU...
if i don't...
SOMEONE JUZ SHOOT ME...

this is lyk juz so daMn right...

How You Are In Love

You fall in love quickly and easily. And very often. You tend to take more than give in relationships. You tend to get very attached when you're with someone. You want to see your love all the time. You love your partner unconditionally and don't try to make them change. You stay in love for a long time, even if you aren't loved back. When you fall, you fall hard.

i realli miss those days...
though it's juz lyk a few wks back...
i still miss u...

i tink i'm to0 used 2 havin' company...
here there aniwhere will go find ppl...
get v.v.bored easily...
this n that...

aniwae...lyk practically the whole world is WRONG...
i dunn0e but there's a lot of things g0in' on..
want to ask but i kn0w there'll nt b ani ans...
but i still asked...and end up still no ans..haha..
expected
y r ppl ALWAYS lyk tt...

there's sumtink seriously wrong wif me...

sMilEs...=))
i juz came back frm VIVO
and i bought that esprit dress that i wanted 2 buy..
happie!!!
but den h0r..it's costed a BOMB la..
as usual...
my almost 100 for one piece of cloth kind of thing...haha..
last time i buy tt skirt..is realli OMG...
this time gt sale..so nt tt jai lAt...
but still..it's ex..=P
oh well..at least bought under my mum's eyes...
so dun nid 2 account for it...=))
HAPPY HAPPY...

ok..but i walked vivo for lyk frm 4 until 7...ok..3h..nt tt bad la...
but TIRED..haha...
i went into Esprit 3 times..hhaahha...
went 2 look at phones...
sony ericsson phones R daMn nice n0w...
gt 2 new ones..nice..=))
i want new phone!!!! =Xx...
i'm sucha spendthrift...
want a lot of nice and expensive things...
tt's y i want to make a lot a lot of money nxt time...
juz in order to satisfy myself...
if nt..bcum tai tai..hahaha...
ok..me n my stupid tai tai dream...=Xx

i tink whether u bcum taitai or nt...
it realli depends on fate..haha..
*y am i sayin' stupid things..*
c0s'...lyk my dad..he last time v.poor de...
and when my mum marry him...oso poor de...
so u nvr kn0w...wt u'll end up as...
tt's y..i nvr despised poor ppl...

everytime i splurge...
i will tink bout h0w the hell am i going to survive nxt time when i gr0w up..
at this age...lyk almost the whole world ard me can feed themselves...and i still need to get $$ frm my parents...lyk even the most basic daily needs..
sIanz....=Xx

hoho...
i juz went 2 do my contacts =))
yayness..haha..
so0n i'll have contacts...=))

been thinking alot..
but well..
i still don't believe that it's me that's over-sensitive..
but i can't do anithin' but believe juz that...

ok..aniwaez..i yest won mj! haha..
can u imagine..i lyk played wif zai-er ppl than me..and i won 2 of them..the other one break even..
haha..luck on my side =))

and if you're short,
don't eva do research...
u cant reach
A LOT
of things

shucks! i dunn0e wad the hell i pressed!!!!
and apparently everything i was typin for the post was DELETED..
daRn...
okies..aniwae...back 2 square one...
was tokin' bout some guy friend...
he's been NOT RIGHT lately..
nt himself...juz that i want 2 ask if he's ok an0t..but don't dare 2 la..
c0s' oso nt close...and dun wan ppl 2 say i KPO...urgH!

and 2dae is another slack day...ok..mayb it's juz a slack morning..
c0s' my mentor isn't ard n0w!haha..
so here i am..half slacking..half drawing mechanisms...
yest was fun...
my mentor was tellin' me say u finish doing this this this..den u can go and eat lunch le...den his friend there say he v.nice 2 us..haha...
den he said ppl lyk us...treat so harsh for wad..end up oso come here experience experience onli..oso won't realli work lyk us (*haha...c0s' i told him i won't want 2 work as researcher la)
den he started tellin' me..though u juz come here exp exp onli...still muz tell prof loh that organic chem is fun! haha...
dne say wad..organic chem is my life..hahaa..

aniwae...if u tink being a chemist is fun and interesting...
think twice k...
and if u're still nt convinced..maybe u shld take up summer research..
and u'll definetely b convinced..haha...
it's THAT mundane..like normal office jobs...
haha..skills wise...ok la..but it's easy 2 pick up the skills c0s' it's mundane..
mayb juz need that interst n knowledge in chem...
mayb the pay is gd c0s' no one wants such jobs...haha..

watch kung fu dunk yest...
it's a nice show leh..haha..
aniwae..while waiting for ro0mie 2 come back...
WHICH TOOK A DAMN LONG TIME..haha..
i tot was juz normal meeting..end up it's evaulation meeting.. daRn..haha..
aniwae..yuppz..me n jason..using the BIG SCREEN..haha...
went blog hopping..
apparetnly we visited 3 blogs..of owners who were depressed, screwed and unstable..
seriously..haha...and i realised one thing in common.. that they blog in proper sentences...
ppl lyk me can't possibly blog in proper sentences de l0r..=P
ok la..the 3rd one didn't realli blog in proper sentences..but it was MUCH MORE proper than my type of bloggin'..hhaha...

i wonder y ppl always blame themselves for sumtink bad that has happened...
i remem. readin' one of their blogs sayin' that happy ppl don't blame anione at all...don't point fingers at anione, nt even themselves...
ok..but even if u blame, shldn't blame for to0 long rite?
or am i juz to0 in-sensitive..haha..i don't tink so ar...
i'm also a THINK TOO MUCH person..
but i also get over things fast..
maybe juz THAT TO0 easily le...
which makes me feel that i'm a bad person...
unfeeling and so-on..
that's y..sometimes, clever is nt gd
makes u tink to0 much and end up bcum a bad bad gurl...
hahah..

hahaha..ok..n0w my screen is bigger than M's...
c0s' i'm using the hall projector..haha..damn shuang..
=P
i'm waiting for J and ro0mie to watch MOVIE!
and i juz randomly ate wif LC..haha..
c0s' apparently i sent him sms say the supplier coming on wed..but end up my wed type without the d..
so he tot it was today...den ask me go eat dinner first...
daMn bored...
2dae's reaction...haha..c0s' we hlpin' mentor do his PHD proj...so end up..he say those data today is v.impt data...
so he muz column it himself...
woohO0o..so end up today is slacking day...
i almost screwed up my reaction la...
i still can't understand how the pressure thing works...
i still dunn0e wad i'm supposed 2 do when i inject the solution thing into the RBF..hahaha...diez...
and i forgt to add dear DCM when i quenching the solution...hahha...
heng i heard my mentor sayin' y the DCM add so little..hahahha..
den i kn0w i 4gt 2 add DCM..if nt ar...surely screw up his rxn one...=Xx...

sian...gt a lot of things 2 brood abt..
now i juz have to slowly slowly wait for FOC..
to get to the bottom of my worries...

slacker!
haha..lyk 30min aft lunch...
and i'm back here slackin'..
oh wells..who ask my reaction to need lyk 1hr to react..=P

ok..i've been doing loadsa things since hols started...
nightlife..haha..but nt that late at night..haha..

first was the normal mj that...isn't interesting animore..

den i played Wii!!! for the first time..hahaha..
ok la...nt say fun..but v.tiring...
but seriously, i suck at computer games..haha..
serious noob at those things...=X
tt time play PSP oso kana laughed at by ch..
he idiot la..laugh at me..
den the Wii owner (paiseh..haha..dun wna 2 write people's names here) played some game...go on a mission den can kill ppl here n there..haha..tt one c him play damn funnie..hijack ppl's car..den knock a lot of ppl down...

and i comtemplated for a v.v.v.long time...*whilst wii-in'
whether or not 2 watch iron man wif dem...
haha..weird c0s' nt v.close to those bunch of ppl..
ok la..1 i know v.well..
the other i juz knew recently..
and the other 2...onli knoe their existence fullstop..
haha..but ok la..iron man..was nice...

the nxt nite...
haha..basically had meeting so cldn't go out..
but 2 purposely say...
went 2 eat sakae wif jason...
=P..i was craving for sushi aft they had theirs the day b4..haha..
lucky jason was ok wif it..=)
but ya..that made me half broke le..

den friday nite..went out wif jcrc ppl..
which made me officially borke..hahha...
and i still owe some ppl $$ =X
how ironic..when i last time liked V...
but end up wanting to tok 2 him but jux didn't have the chance to..
and this time round..i ended up goin' to bugis wif him al0ne...
haha...but then..i tink n0w he tinks that i'm a super damn boring person..haha..
c0s' i practically didn't say a word at all throughout the whole journey..
unless he toked to me..hahahaha..
i juz didn't know wad 2 say..and didn't wan 2 come up with ani topic..
c0s' to0 tired 2 tink...haha..
we took damn long 2 get 2 bugis la...
c0s' someone was hungry...so we went 2 buy doughnuts den eat at one corner..haha..
so saddening la...and we ended up walkin' frm one end of the mrt station to the other..juz 2 look for dustbin..hahaha..seriously..sad leh..dun there..they go and station the dustbins at the ends of the station..=Xx

aniwae..we ate steamboat..
ok la..gt at least half the jcrc there..haha..
but i didn't know bugis gt so mani steamboat shop there...
but more ex than marina..we paid ard $16..
den we contemplated bout where 2 go nxt...
stand ard for DAMN long..end up decided 2 eat dessert...
but dessert was nice...i ate one almond w tang yuan thing.. =)
I LOVE TANG YUAN =)
haha..

aft tt went to some plc...i forgt where..
to juz chill..
ordered wine...*which made me officially BROKE*
haha..but the red wine was nice la..
but i was damn disappointed wif my jiu liang..
maybe c0s' i damn tired le...so even more easily drunk..
ok..i wasn't exactly drunk..juz cannot realli walk in a str. line...hahha..
and a bit of headache...and i juz wanted 2 close my eyes...
tired dosen't go wif drinking..haha..obvious..=X
reach back at 2plus...slp n woke up at 830..
haha..lyk wth..i still can wake up at 830..
but of c0s'i went back 2 slp la...

and juz now was tokin' 2 my ro0mie...
'confessing' to my sins..haha..
but aniwae...juz can't hlp wondering wth is he tryin' 2 do la...
it's juz so irritating...one day he treats u lyk shit...the other day he waiting for u to tok 2 him...
i'm damn sick of this kind of treatment le...
so immuned..maybe with the combination of all these factors...i've given up h0pe in him..
seriously l0r..tt time..he say wan 2 mj...den i cannot..so tell him go slp first..at nite den mj..he ying ying dun wan..
aft tt my mentor release us early..i tell him can mj le..den he say okok..
end up when i went back..the fucker was alr. on the bed...
i dunn0e wth he tryin' 2 do k...
made me happily rush back for nothin'...
and when i've given up askin' him for dinner...he's waiting for me 2 ask him for dinner...
hah. WTH l0r..
that time...i shld have juz told him i was watchin movie wif jason la...
i tot he didn't care..so i juz didn't bother...
but even so...i tink he's hurt me enuff...
ever since that time..i toked 2 him on msn..and told him that his wan xia0 kai tai da le...and that he has hurt me enuff...
i tink since tt time...i gave up h0pe on him le..
hopefull that will be the last time i cry over him...

i'm so forgetful until nvr bring enuff jeans for my summer research..=P
n0w i'm wearin' meech's jeans...
i lyk my mentor...quite slack..haha..
he bu she de let us do to0 much..
all u have to do is to give him the sleeeeeply face...
but i was tinkin'..haha..my face look v.sleeeeply meh..he always say i look sleeeepy...
i look normal...-_- <--lyk tt..
hahahaha...

2dae i smelled the stinky smell..
c0s' usually won't b able to smell c0s' gt block nose..
but 2dae nt so blocked...so can smell..
oh...this sounds so lame la..=Xx..

and there was some stupid false fire alarm...
we in the lab..stand dere for v.long b4 we decided to evacuate out of the building...
these ppl ar....fire alarm oso want to make false one...and nvr say that it is false one..den ppl dun believe..
if lAter real one..ppl dun believe h0w ar...

slacking my ass off...today..gt some talk..so it took up the morning..
i didn't do much in da morning..
haha..and i dozeddddd offfff when that whoeva frm HK was tokin' bout' his organic synthesis...i wonder y will have such talks..they come here gt wad motive one leh?? giv talk gt wad motive one leh???
lunch was EARLY..haha..1115 lyk tt...
but gd la..dun nid squeeze wif crowd..and 2dae i nvr eat breakfast..so my stomach growling during the talk lia0...
WAHAHAHAHA...

the can A atm is going to say bye bye..so WTH...
and n0w..ok la..if the can B one is still dere..i won't complain...the most go can B tt time den draw money...
but if all goin' 2 say bye bye ar...
i'll say the sch is stupid..=xx

it's time...
now i can understand...
我可以放手了。。。
我看到了一个。。。
不该看的东西。。
明白了一些事情。。。
everyone has a past..all i can say is..don't brood on sumtink that's alr. been lyk 2 yrs ago...2yrs i a v.long time to brood over things...
i can't even brood over sumtink lyk tt for 2 yrs...haha...
maybe i'm juz to0 hard hearted...
funnie...h0w guys think...

all i can say is...

i don't like you animore...

yest went for foc senior camp @ sentosa...
didn't realli wan 2 play the beach games one..c0s' i dun lyk beach games..=P
but i tink the beach games were ok...
dunn0e bout the last one la..c0s' heard gt a lot of prob...
but aniwae...when u run things...
keep in mind that..nothin' will be perfectly carried out...
you have to be mentally prepared that there are certain stufffz that will be cancelled, certain things modified
even during the real thing itself...
so..as long as u don't have the mindset that everything MUST run smoothly...
everything MUST be done accordingly to scehdule, then it will be fine...
that was my takeaway..during some fitness camp tt we organized for canoeing...
won't go into details...but ya...when u go thru it..u'll understand...

then came fright night..seriously gt daMn bored of waiting..
i tink gt lyk wait for an hr plus plus plus l0r...
but fright nite on da whole...ok...
juz that one thing i don't agree..is that the route is downsloping....
i've alr. done the best i can..to advice them that it is not a gd idea of downslope...
and since they tink it's to0 bright when goin' upslope..
den...let them deemfit..
but still..for safety reasons...they shldn't make it downslope...
if they don't heed...i gt nothin' 2 say..except...
any casualties on that day...they bear consequences themselves...

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